Monday:
Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It's fun to cook for Tim. Today I made an angel food cake and the recipe said, "beat 12 eggs separately."
Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I had to borrow enough bowls
to beat the eggs in. The cake turned out Fine though.

Tuesday:
We wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, "serve without dressing." So I didn't dress. But Tim happened to bring a friend home for supper that night. They both looked so startled when I served them, I think it was the salad.

Wednesday:
I decided to serve rice and found a recipe which said, "wash thoroughly before steaming the rice." So I heated some water and took a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kinda silly in the middle of the week. I can't say it improved the rice anyhow.

Thursday:
Today Tim asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said, prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving." I hunted all over the place for a garden and when I got one I tossed my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over there for over one
hour so the dog would not take it. Tim came over and asked if I felt all right. I wonder
why? He must be stressed at work, I'll try and be supportive.

Friday:
Today I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, "put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it." beat it I did, to my mum's place. There must have been something wrong with the recipe,because when I came back home again, it looked the same as when I left it.

Saturday:
Tim went shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I found an old doll dress and it's little cute shoes. I thought the hen looked really cute. When Tim saw it, he started counting to ten. Either he was really stressed because of his work, or he wanted the chicken to dance. When I asked him what was wrong he started crying and shouting out "why me? why me?". It has to be his job.

These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website by foreigners around the world and were answered by the website owner (great sense of humor!).

Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa ? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.


Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, its only two thousand kilometers take lots of water...


Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa ? ( Sweden )
A: So its true what they say about Swedes...


Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa ? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town , Knysna and Jeffreys Bay ? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the pacific. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not...oh forget it. Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.


Q: Which direction is north in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and well send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.


Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is....oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, come naked.


Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa ? ( France )
A: No, WE don t stink.


Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere where a significant number of Americans gather.


Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.


Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.


Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa ? ( Germany )
A: Not yet, but for you, well import them.


Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round?
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.


Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can di spense rattlesnake serum.( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.


Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will probably still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but youll have to learn it first.

They are not dead,
Who leave us this great heritage of remembering joy.

They still live in our hearts,
In the happiness we knew, in the dreams we shared.

They still breathe,
In the lingering fragrance,windblown, from their favourite flowers.

They still smile in the moonlight’s silver,
And laugh in the sunlight’s sparking gold.

They still speak in the echoes of the words we’ve heard them say again and again.

They still move,
In the rhythm of waving grasses, in the dance of the tossing branches.

They are not dead;
Their memory is warm in our hearts, comfort in our sorrow.

They are not apart from us, but part of us,

For love is eternal,
And those we love shall be with us throughout all eternity.
Anon

My name is Amos but people call me Sean. My ethnic background explains a lot of who I am, and the values that I have developed. I grew up with a large family because my parents took the religious decree, go out and fill the earth, literally. I have 2 brothers and 5 sisters, but not such a big family when everyone is all grown up. Growing up in this environment helped mold me into the man that I have become today.
My family is religious and we went to church every week. Even as a child I attended church schooling where they taught us about our religion, manners and place in society, which in turn educated me about where I came from. However, now I am not that religious and don't go to church often because I believe it is becoming corrupted and commercialized. My family and my parents in particular, provided me with the morals that I hold to be true. I am very grateful of the way my parents brought me up. They always told me do to others as you would like them to do to you. That phrase is what I keep in mind but in a more corrupted manner, ‘do unto others before they do unto you.’
I haven't always done the right thing, but I have learned from it when I think back. The foundation has been set for me so I just have to build upon it.
I literally eat, sleep, watch a bit of telly, go on the net and study a little. I sometimes try to fit in a bit of exercise once in a while but I'm terribly unfit most of the time. I enjoy going on the internet but sometimes i get so addicted i find myself on for hours and hours but basically that’s what IT people do.
I enjoy being at home with my family but sometimes i prefer to be outside and away for a while.

My room is often quite messy because i tend to immediately throw things on my bed or floor when i arrive home from work or a day out with friends. I rarely hang up my clothes when i take them off and you will find socks and other stuff lying around the floor. That’s just me.

I love African American comedy, to be precise Dave Chappelle, Steve Harvey and Kat Williams, mainly because it’s a good laugh and the ideas are so random and different, its so ridiculously funny. I can go on and on about the set of comedians but i think that's just going to bore you to death considering that you also know them very well, hopefully. Like everyone, i have friends. (thank God). However, i don't have many close friends, only a small group of close friends that i trust and know very well.
I am me. I am Sean, my culture and environment has shaped who I am, for good and for bad. I battle some stereotypes and try to be different. I try not to judge others before I know them. I am neither perfect, nor do I try to be. Although I do not fight, I still learn and I listen to what is going on around me.

Let us suppose the government sent us each a tax rebate of Kshs. 100,00 to help us through the credit crunch? If we spent it on a bicycle, the money would go to China. If we spent the it on fuel it would go to Saudi Arabia. If we bought a computer, it would go to India. If we purchased fruit juice it would go to South Africa. If we purchased a good car, it would go to Germany or Japan. The only